Hudson Valley Astrologer

We were FaceTiming just the other day, swapping weekend warrior stories about the exploits of our endless home improvement projects. Alexander was knee-deep in tile dust, wielding a wet saw with the precision of an artist laying terracotta pieces on the kitchen floor. Meanwhile, I was on the other end of the call, sawzall in hand, chasing down every stubborn corner of my house that dared to cry out for attention. Yet, despite all our tools and determination, there’s one thing neither of us has managed to cut through: the conundrum of time-and-money.

When I mentioned my trusty multi-tool, Alexander lit up like a kid on Christmas morning. He raved about his own and casually dropped that he got it for a steal at Harbor Freight. “Harbor What?” I asked, genuinely baffled, like when he explains oblique ascension in the context of rectifying a horoscope. As it turns out, a brand-new Harbor Freight had opened just a mile from my house—a fact I somehow missed with my sawdust encrusted eyelids.

If I could go on a shopping spree, I’d make Harbor Freight my first stop. I’d load up on every tool imaginable—power tools, hand tools, tools I don’t even know how to use yet. Then I’d cross the river to William’s Lumber in Rhinebeck to stockpile siding, roofing, cabinetry, wood—you name it. My front yard would become a DIY paradise (or possibly a lumberyard nightmare). From there, I’d dive headfirst into YouTube’s treasure trove of “how-to-fix-it” channels and transform myself into the ultimate home improvement virtuoso.

HVA

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